Judges

By

Gary DeVaney

“INTELLIGENCE IS CATEGORICAL”

“INSANITY IS CONTAGIOUS”

Samson

Theologians agree that this book was written by unknown authors. It gives an account for each generation abandoning the Biblical God (Jehovah) for other Gods and the manner in which Jehovah deals with it.

Judges 1:4-6 God slew 10,000 and cut off Adonibezek’s thumbs and big toes.

Adonibezek

Judges 2:11-14 God’s chosen people forsook Him, and God sold them out to their enemies.

Judges 3:12-29 The Israelites offended God. God strengthened Eglon, King of Moab against them, who defeated them. The Israelites cried out to God. God raised up, for them, a savior, the Benjamite, Ehud, who was left handed. Ehud made himself a foot long knife and hid it under his clothes on his right thigh. He told King Eglon he had a message for him and in private thrust the dagger into King Eglon’s belly. He died. Ehud made good his escape and the Israelites killed 10,000 Moabites. Not a man escaped.

God had Biblical saviors before Jesus Christ? Well, maybe God’s next savior will be more civilized than Ehud was.

Judges 3:31 Shamgar slew 600 Philistines.

It seems this “savior” is also into God’s murdering. Maybe, if we had a female leader, things wouldn’t be so bloody. Can you imagine the Israelites having a female judge or a female leader of any kind? Is it testosterone that does God’s murdering work?

Judges 4:2 God sold Israel out and into slavery to Jabin, the Canaanite King.

That would be like the New York based Council on Foreign Relations arranging for The United States of America to be defeated by a foreign power.

Lawyer critic: That’s for another book.

What? I shouldn’t have mentioned that? No. It fits this work.

Here comes a couple of God’s Biblical heroines:

Judges 4:4 The Prophetess Deborah was judging Israel.

What? A woman? I’ll bet the Rabbis down-play this passage. Had you heard of this?

The dogma: God gave human beings freedom of choice. However, God gets mad, sad and sorry and destroys people throughout the Bible because of the choices they make.

Judges 4:16-21 (As Deborah prophesized): The entire army of Sisera was slain, not one man survived. Jael, Heber’s wife, aids an ally by inviting Sisera to sleep in her tent while she kept guard. She gave him milk and covered him. Then, she took a tent peg and hammer and nailed him through his head into the ground while he slept. So he died. Catholic

Jael nails Sisera through his head

Behold: As evidence of Deborah and Jael, murdering women can be God-like too.

A revisit: Jud 5:24-27 Blessed above women be Jael. He asked for water, she gave him milk. She reached for the peg and workman’s mallet. She hammered Sisera, crushed his head. She smashed in his temple. At her feet, he fell still, slain.

What? This Biblical God turned on His Own people? Again?

How come it’s “God’s chosen” that wages war, mostly against other “God’s chosen”? Even if one whips the other’s buttocks, both tend to suffer much.

Maybe it’s the suffering that is “God’s chosen”.

Judges 6:12-16 An angel of God said Gideon was His champion and that God was with him. Gideon said: If God is with us, why has all this happened to us. Now God has abandoned us. God said: It is I who send you. Gideon said: My family is the meanest Catholic poor KJV in Manasseh and I am the most significant Catholic I am the least KJV in my father’s house. God said: Go murder Midian to the last man.

Gideon Defeats the Midianites

Another example of documented differences between Catholic and King James versions.

Judges 6:22-23 Gideon said: God, I have seen the angel of God, face to face. God said: Be calm, don’t fear. You won’t die.

Judges 8:10 God murdered 120,000 men that drew sword.

Are you numb as to numbers this God has murdered yet?

Judges 8:21 Gideon murdered Zebah and Zalmunna.

Judges 8:30 Gideon (one of the Biblical God’s heroes) had 70 sons, for he had many wives. His concubine bore him a son whom he named Abimelech.

Judges 9:1-5 Abimelech murdered his 70 brothers.

Abimelech Murdered His 70 Brothers

Judges 9:1-5 Abimelech asked the citizens of Shechem: Which is better for you, being ruled by 70 men or 1 man? They picked him. Abimelech murdered his 70 brothers.

Judges 9:53-56 A woman fractured Abimelech’s head. He immediately ordered his armor-bearer to finish him off and to say that the woman killed him. His attendant ran him through and he died. God took revenge on Abimelech for killing his 70 brothers.

Here is another of God’s murderous female heroes. Why did she remain anonymous?

Judges 10:7 The anger of God was hot against Israel and He sold them out. KJV

Was this due to Abimelech’s murdering his 70 brothers?

Judges 10:12-14 God said: When you cried out, I saved you. You still forsook Me and worshipped other gods. So, I will save you no more. Go and cry out to the gods you have chosen and let them save you.

Doesn’t this sound like a typical, jealous, childish response? What other gods?

Judges 10-20 The Jews asked: Don’t you know the Philistines are our rulers? We have come to take you prisoner. Samson agreed and was tied up. God released Samson’s hands; he found a jawbone of an ass and killed 1,000 men. Samson said: With the jawbone of an ass, I have slain a thousand men.

Who of God’s heroes, so far, have not murdered anyone? Could Samson possibly be but another of God’s horny leaders / heroes? What are the odds?

Judges 11:1 Jephthah was born of a harlot.

What? Jephthah, God’s hero, was born of a harlot who was paid for sex?

Let’s see. How many ways can I misinterpret and misrepresent these texts?

Judges 11:30-39 Jephthah vowed to God: Give me victory and I will give to you the first thing that comes through my door for a burnt offering. This “in-control” God had Jephthah murder 20 cities and then God had Jephthah’s happy daughter come through his door, to welcome her father. Jephthah gave his virgin daughter 2 months to mourn her virginity because she couldn’t live long enough to bear children. She had to die. By burnt offering, Jephthah sacrificed his 13-year-old daughter by burnt offering to your Biblical God.

Jephthah Vowed to God

Any tears?

God’s hero, Jephthah, murders 20 cities, then sacrifices his only child, his virgin daughter, who obviously loved her daddy. Did God arrange for her to greet him at his door upon his homecoming? What a God! Do you think that God still enjoyed smelling her burning fat from around her organs as depicted in Leviticus?

God did not change much as He did not call off human sacrifice even with Jesus. Jephthah goes on to murder 42,000 brother Israelites. God rewards him to judge Israel for 6 years.

Today, our Godly United States Government still sacrifices our best babies for its political killing agendas. Other than sounding like fearful, obedient sheep, we do little to stop it. Most actually support it!

Judges 12:6-7 Jephthah murdered 42,000 Ephraimites and judged Israel for 6 years.

What? Aren’t Ephraimites, who are named after Ephraim the son of Joseph, Israelites too? Ephraimites came from Joseph’s seed, Ephraim. Why wasn’t this tribe called Josephites? Joseph was one of the 12 brothers, who headed up the 12 tribes? Did Jacob override Joseph’s title breaking protocol? Wasn’t God’s favorite Hebrew bloodline compromised with Ephraim due to his mother being Egyptian? Isn’t this more Biblical hypocrisy?

Judges 12:8-9 Then, Ibzan judged Israel. He had 30 sons and 30 daughters.

Judges 12:13 Abdon judged Israel. He had 40 sons.

What? How many of God’s appointed leaders were documented sex maniacs?

Boy, that could never happen with our leaders today - could it?

Judges 13 Israel again offended God, so it’s 40 years more slavery for them with the Philistines. An angel of God appeared to a woman (Hannah) and said: You are barren.

You will conceive. Be careful to take no wine or strong drink. The son you bear is to be consecrated to God from the womb. He will deliver Israel from the Philistines. He was named Samson.

Note: This is a positive, noteworthy C&V passage concerning booze and pregnancy.

God slam-dunks His chosen Israelites again and again, each time to predestine a savior to save them. Then, the re-cycle continues. What torture! What a God!

Did you ever notice that many of God’s Old Testament hero’s mothers are old, barren, can’t have children, and are maternally dysfunctional.

In the New Testament, there is a young, virgin mother named Mary, who many Catholics still swear remained and died a virgin, despite vast documentation showing she had numerous kids.

This God punishes His children while rewarding His enemies. Sound fair? Righteous? Good? Loving? Want to invite Him home? Would you want this God to baby-sit your child, especially if your child is sick, handicapped or has sinned?

Samson’s Mother Hanna

Judges 13:24 The woman (Hannah) bore a son and named him Samson and God blessed him.

Samson is probably a good guy, right?

Judges 14:1-4 Samson wanted for a wife a Philistine woman (outside of his religion) to provide The Biblical God an opportunity against the Philistines.

The Biblical God arranges for an opportunity to fight and murder a group of people?

Judges 14:6 Without weapons, Samson tore a lion to pieces.

Judges 14:8-9 Later, when he returned to marry the woman who pleased him, he ate honey from the lion’s dead carcass. He gave some for his mother and father to eat without telling them that he scooped the honey from the dead lion’s carcass.

Samson is another sick puppy. Boy, can this God ever pick them…　

Judges 14:11-20 Samson bet 30 men 30 tunics to solve a riddle. Upon losing the bet, The Spirit of God inspired Samson to murder 30 men in town for their tunics to pay the debt off. Samson’s wife, who had just married him, made him lose the bet, then, she married Samson’s best man.

Samson, God inspired, murdered 30 innocent men so to steal their tunics to pay off a gambling debt”? Good God!

Judges 15:4-5 Samson caught 300 foxes, tied their tails together, set them afire and they burned the countryside.

Samson Set 300 Foxes On Fire

What kind of a humanitarian touch is this for Samson or for God? Do members of PETA support this God?

Judges 15:6-8 The Philistines asked who had done this and was told it was because Samson’s wife had been given to his best man. The Philistines (while trying to correct the injustice) killed her and her family by fire. Samson, then inflicted great slaughter on her people, (those same Philistines).

Judges 16:1 Samson had sex with a harlot.

Who? What? One of God’s heroes and “good guys” had sex with a what? A harlot - again?

Judges 16:4 Samson fell in love with Delilah.

Judges 16:10 & 13 Samson lied to Delilah.

Judges 16:17 Samson told Delilah the truth about his strength and long hair. The Philistines brought money. While he slept in her lap, she had them shave his head. Then, she began to mistreat him. The Philistines gouged out Samson’s eyes. Samson killed more men and women bringing down the temple than he had killed during his entire lifetime, and died himself. Samson judged Israel for 20 years.

Delilah Had Them Shave His Head Samson Destroys Pagan Temple

Samson murdered many? Yes! But, didn’t Samson, like Jesus, also commit suicide?

Was Samson, with his murderous, lying, whoring character consecrated from the womb to serve God in this manner?

Judges 18:7-10 Laish, those whom you go against are a trusting people. God has put them in your power (to murder?)

Judges 18:27-28 They attacked Laish, a quite and trusting people. They murdered them and destroyed their city by fire.

Critic / believer: I never seen God kill nobody. I don’t care what that book says. He never done it.

What? They were a quiet and trusting people and God ordered their murders? I am about sick of this murderous bunch and their Boss. Are these the beautiful stories you worship?

Judges 19 A Levite man’s concubine, who was unfaithful to him visits her father’s house. Her master, the Levite man, spends time there. They leave to go home. On their way they seek shelter in Gilbeah, where they are taken in by an old man and his daughter. Certain men of the tribe of Benjamin knock at their door wanting the Levite man to come out so they could have sex with him. The old man begs them to take his daughter or the man’s concubine instead, stating: Do what you want with them. (This part is a Biblical parallel to the Lot and his 2 daughters story). The husband seized his concubine and thrust her outside the door to them (nice guy). They all had sex with her all night and she fell down at the door until daylight. Her master finding her, told her to get up. She couldn’t. He put her on an ass and took her to their home where he cut her into 12 pieces, including her bones. He then sent the 12 pieces to the 12 tribes of Israel.

Judges 20:17- 21 They assembled 400,000 footmen with sword and attacked the Benjamites. 1/10th of the tribes were gathered. 26,000 Benjamites faced the enemy, their brother Israelis. The first day the Benjamites killed 22,000 Israelis.

Judges 20:22 The Israelites asked God: Should I again engage my brother Benjamin in battle? God answered: They should.

One can almost hear this God say: Hurry, I need my fix of blood, pain and agony! Quick! Go kill! What’s the delay?

Judges 20:24 When they met for the second time, the Benjamites killed another 18,000 Israelites.

Judges 20:26-28 The Israelites offered sacrifice to God and He said: Attack tomorrow and you will win (kick buttocks).

Judges 20:35 On the third day the Israelis killed 25,100 Benjamites.

God, as the Israelite’s military intelligence officer, flunked this battle.

Judges 20:26-28 The Israelites offered sacrifice to God and He said: Attack tomorrow and I will deliver them to you.

You do know that Joseph’s younger, of the 11 brothers, was Benjamin, whom this tribe descended from. Brother Israelites are once again killing their brother Israelites. Oh the logic, the reason! Just what is par for this course?　

Judges 20:47 Six hundred Benjamites survived and fled.

Later, they were given Israelite captured virgins taken from an enemy because it was declared that no Israelite women would be a wife to a Benjamite.

Judges 20:48 The Israelites murdered the inhabitants of the Benjamite cities they chanced upon. Moreover, they destroyed, by fire, all the cities they came upon.

Judges 21:10-11 12,000 soldiers were ordered to Jabesh-Gilead to murder those who lived there including women and children. That included all males and all non-virgin women.

Do you understand what is being stated here? GOD! Once you trigger these peoples’ murdering frenzy, they don’t stop or know when to quit. They are chips off the old God.

Judges 29:41 The Benjamites were amazed, for they saw that evil had come among them.

Does that include all males and all non-virgin women?

Were some of those non-virgin women wives? Do you understand what is being stated here? GOD! Once you trigger these peoples’ murdering frenzy, they don’t stop or know when to quit. They are chips off the old God.

Could all this be the result of inbreeding? Remember: Abraham and his wife Sarah were also half brother and Sister.

Abraham’s son Isaac, a product of incest, was the only human sacrifice that God spared. The Koran infers it was his older brother Ishmael.

Isaac beget Jacob, who was the Father of 12 sons by 4 different women, 2 sets of sisters or possibly all 4 were sisters, daughters of Laban (Torah). At least 2 (Leah and Rachel) were definitely cousins to Jacob.

These 12 sons who were genetically a result of inbreeding became the fameous12 tribes of Israel.

Statistically, over a career, Michael Jordan is probably the greatest professional basketball player the world has experienced to date.

I view religion to be like basketball and its rules; whereby, almost everybody thinks they are Michael Jordan. GWD

What one person, who you know, would be impacted if sent to this site?

Comments? Questions? Corrections?

gary@gdevaney.com